Nipples in the Workplace?

I just have one question: what do you do when one of the most senior, female executives in your company has a habit of showing up to meetings, presentations or lunch with HUGE, unrestrained, erect nipples poking through her clothing? So much that folks talk about it and are so distracted that they don't ever remember what she said. I'd love to hear how you savvy people have handled this in a way that is constructive, yet does not screw with your ability to stay employed and climb that steep corporate ladder. I say go to (http://www.johnlewis.com/) to the "underwear solutions" section and purchase some silicone nipple covers (better known as "petal tops"), slip them in an inter-office envelope and send them to her office anonymously....

The Power Hungry Executive Assistant....

You've all met him or her. It's the executive assistant that thinks he (or she) has all the power of his executive....and abuses it. I'm going to generalize here, but this is especially true of those assistants that support really high level executives AND have no meaningful life outside of their work. It's the person that lives in an unremarkable, unfulfilled, lonely and tragic life -- he (or she) then looks to his job and company to augment what's missing outside of the office. It's this person that looks at every phone call, meeting request, drive-by visit or email as a "moment of power" that exists in his otherwise empty life. Funny thing is that because of the ever present politics and desires to stay on the "good side" of the executive in charge, the bulk of the folks dealing with this pitiful assistant will find themselves kissing up to him (or her).....which feeds the beast and perpetuates the perceived (or real) power play of the executive assistant. In other words, for a minute or two, it gives the assistant the false feeling of relevance, which is addictive -- like a drug. How many of you know one of these creatures? And what should be done so that we don't waste another second trying to stay in the good graces of an assistant simply because he (or she) is miserable and has lost sight? Do tell....